No games today. No planned activities. We just talked and shared.
Sometimes, that’s the best thing to do.
One thing we both noticed is that I’m helping her as much as she is helping me. So even though I’m paying her for these sessions, we are both benefitting from them.
Which is exactly the way they should work!
In truth, these sessions are about building friendship and connection because doing so increases positive focus when that friendship is positively focused.
Positively focused friendship is friendship where you each know that the other person is in your corner. The other person has your back. When both of you know that, the intimacy of the friendship continues to increase.
Toward the end of today’s session I ended up helping her to understand how she can remove some blocks from her life. One thing that we all have a tendency to do is to be judgmental about ourselves. We both consciously recognized in conversation just how much we beat ourselves up. Beating ourselves up actually holds us back tremendously because when we beat ourselves up, we are actually just being very judgmental about ourselves. That judgmental side prevents us from appreciating the exact same things we are judgmental about from a kinder viewpoint.
When we are able to look at ourselves with kindness, what that effectively does is to open us up to exploring new possibilities we would not otherwise explore when we are in our judgmental modes. That’s why judgment holds us back. It prevents us from seeing possibilities and alternatives that we would normally see otherwise.
So today was a very useful session for both of us, because it really reinforced how important it is to be self-aware regarding our own tendencies and motive expression. Our words matter because our feelings behind the words matter. Emotion is what our lives. Our thoughts direct our lives, but our emotions, similar to how having a car running enables us to drive where we want to, but you don’t get anywhere until you press the gas pedal. Emotions are the gas pedal.
Today was a particularly great breakthrough day, despite the fact that we didn’t have an actual plan activity. Open ended, unplanned conversation can do that.
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